Self Love Part 1 - Stop Negative Self Talk

Self-Love…..Part 1 – Negative Self Talk

What is self-love?

“Regard for one’s own well-being and happiness (chiefly considered as a desirable rather than a narcissistic characteristic.”

Yeah, yeah love yourself – heard it all before –  trust me, I’ve dabbled here and there with self-help, didn’t focus, didn’t commit, didn’t believe – but once I stayed consistent on this self-love path, my life really did change.  My life is not perfect by any means – but I can honestly say that I’m happy and I love my life.

Okay, I’m still reading….now tell me how?

I would describe self-love as taking care of your heart…..

I’ll address my fellow females and try to help with the struggles I hear from them.  (Yo, my struggles too….I’m still trying to learn as well)

#1 Stop negative talk

               This is probably the most common I come across….being hard on yourself “I’m fat”, “im not good/smart/pretty/etc enough”, “I hate this or that about myself”, “I failed…” etc. 

I’m certain you’ve heard the advice – “Would you speak to a friend that way? If not, then don’t talk to yourself that way either.”  Seriously….where did we learn that we should have these types of thoughts in our heads.  I’m sure as kids we didn’t think these horrible things….along the way life changed us….Change back….reprogram.  Stop focusing on the bad and spin it a different way….

Yes, it will take effort – but what is your alternative?  Keep bashing yourself?  Never growing and being “stuck” in this mindset of negativity?   The negativity will pop into your head, but instead of entertaining that thought – recognize it then redirect…..

For instance…

You put on a form fitting shirt, look at yourself in the mirror and say to yourself, “ugh, you’re disgusting – fat. Change your shirt so no one has to look at your rolls all day.”

Okay, so that thought came into your head, acknowledge that your negativity has come out to bully you again and then redirect that thought…look again at yourself and instead say….

1- “I am not comfortable with what I look like in this shirt, but I am exercising and eating healthier so I will be soon.” Or 2 – “I don’t feel my physique is flattered with this shirt so I’ll change into something that accentuates my nice legs instead.” Or 3 – “So I have a few extra pounds, so what? No one is perfect – I like this color so I’ll wear it anyway.”

Regardless of the positive thought you replace that initial thought, don’t forget to also tell yourself that you love what you look like at any body weight.  Keep telling yourself even if you don’t believe…You will one day or at least you will finally make the commitment to change.

One day, you’ll put on that same shirt and you’ll look in the mirror and love yourself – or better yet, won’t even have to double check yourself in the mirror because you know you look good.

Keep doing this as many times as needed.  You won’t catch and toss all negative thoughts, but the more effort you put into reprogramming – the more positive your self-love talk will become natural.

Stay tuned for Part 2 – Self Love – bad cop style (same topic but I’ll tell it like it is)